Theology Forum Point Tally

The part of the church where the silliest things happen. Conversations that sound like they belong in the youth room will be moved here.
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What's the best way to keep score in the TF?

List individual salvos that hit (ala Battleship)
5
12%
Record by individual poster (Del 6, CPS 0)
1
2%
Record by Denomination
2
5%
Record by Macro Faith Tradition (RCC, Prot, Orth)
4
10%
Display "Kills" by Taco (5 means yer an ace)
18
43%
<zederated>
10
24%
Sarcasm is NOT appreciated!
2
5%
 
Total votes: 42

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OldWorldSwine
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Post by OldWorldSwine » Fri Jul 19, 2013 3:48 pm

Skip wrote:
UncleBob wrote:After a nice hiatus, we are back!

*UPDATE*

Although the "Pope to Offer Indulgences via Twitter" thread is in the Fellowship Hall, it really should be moved to the Theology Room. It is an exciting battle royal between The Protestants and the Catholics over what salvation is and, by extension, who gets it. Tallies to soon follow!

Chance of Rapture for 19 July 2013: 14%

We are at DEFCON 5.
Man, I'd managed to avoid even looking at that thread, knowing full-well the whizzing contest that would no doubt be present and desiring to remain well clear of the splash zone. Now I suppose I have to act like a mod... :evil:
But I thought the Pope's Twitter thread was going pretty well, considering.
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Post by Skip » Fri Jul 19, 2013 5:31 pm

TNLawPiper wrote:All right, folks -- "too cool for school" is not a moniker to be taken literally. How old are you guys, anyway? <redacted_emoji>
Now you're suggesting that we're too old for school?
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Post by TNLawPiper » Fri Jul 19, 2013 5:41 pm

Skip wrote:
TNLawPiper wrote:All right, folks -- "too cool for school" is not a moniker to be taken literally. How old are you guys, anyway? <redacted_emoji>
Now you're suggesting that we're too old for school?
Yeah, I am! :twisted:

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Post by UncleBob » Sat Jul 20, 2013 1:37 pm

*DAILY POST*

The "Pope to Offer Indulgences via Twitter" thread has died down--possibly due to the Observer Effect. However, we can now all squabble over "R" rated movies and whether or no Jesus would watch Reservoir Dogs.

Chance of Rapture for 20 July 2013: 61%

We are at DEFCON 5.

That is all.
"One man's theology is another man's belly laugh." - Robert A. Heinlein

"Many of the points here, taken to their logical conclusions, don't hold up to logic; they're simply Godded-up ways of saying "I don't like that." - Skip

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Post by JimVH » Sat Jul 20, 2013 2:36 pm

I miss righteous umbrage.
"When God closes a door, just open it again. It's a door. That's how they work." FredS

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Post by UncleBob » Sat Jul 20, 2013 4:05 pm

JimVH wrote:I miss righteous umbrage.
That's RIGHTEOUS UMBRAGE.
"One man's theology is another man's belly laugh." - Robert A. Heinlein

"Many of the points here, taken to their logical conclusions, don't hold up to logic; they're simply Godded-up ways of saying "I don't like that." - Skip

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Post by JimVH » Sat Jul 20, 2013 5:02 pm

UncleBob wrote:
JimVH wrote:I miss righteous umbrage.
That's RIGHTEOUS UMBRAGE.
Indeed!
"When God closes a door, just open it again. It's a door. That's how they work." FredS

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Post by UncleBob » Sun Jul 21, 2013 2:02 pm

*DAILY POST*

All Theology Room threads have quieted. Still, let's be careful out there.

Chance of Rapture for 21 July 2013: 29%

That is all.
"One man's theology is another man's belly laugh." - Robert A. Heinlein

"Many of the points here, taken to their logical conclusions, don't hold up to logic; they're simply Godded-up ways of saying "I don't like that." - Skip

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Post by ATexanLostinVirginia » Sun Jul 21, 2013 2:28 pm

FredS wrote:
UncleBob wrote:*UPDATE*

Points awarded to Del for his impressive post:
Del wrote:
Joshoowah wrote:
wosbald wrote: I don't believe that this is a question of forcing Baptism. There is a difference between saying "You will receive Baptism or you will die" and saying "You have been found guilty of such and such a crime. Those who receive Baptism will have their sentence commuted and those who do not will have the sentence carried out."

That said, this may not be the most prudent policy, since it tempts disingenuous men to receive Baptism under false pretenses and invites the creation of a situation similar to that of the Murano Jews.
Point me to a source, as I haven't found one, to where this was an act of grace?
found this, a few pages back.

We have to stop thinking like moderns, where our salvation is in one personal little box and our citizenship, our career, our home life and such are all in other little boxes.

When the barbarian was conquered, Charlemagne offered the opposing general or king and option: Ally with me, or die as my enemy.

An alliance with King Charlemagne would include mass acceptance of Christianity, missionary priests in the region, establishment of monasteries.... as well as an exchange of knights, tokens of tribute and esteem, etc.

If the barbarian king proved faithless, then Charlemagne would return and take everything. Otherwise, the region would eventually become a Christian region, and the barbarian would aid Charlemagne in his wars against other barbarians.

Now... as far as "grace" is concerned, it was gracious of Charlemagne to offer fealty to the defeated army and protection to their homelands. Quite frankly, this is precisely what a Christian general should be expected to do. Anything less would be cruel.
This may be the most awesome post in a theology forum I have ever read. Wow.

+1 pt for the "We need to stop thinking like moderns.." Would it not be better if the Church was everything?

+2 pts for the theological gymnastics needed to twist conquest and forced baptism into graciousness. That is some impressive hegemony.

Congratulations Del!
Del's post struck me much the same way as it did you UB. I didn't jump in there 'cause I'm trying to stay out of the gutter, but. . .Del has a romantic notion that things were all peaches and cream during the middle ages when his church ruled. There was no homosexuality, no abortions, no heretics, no unjust violence, no crooked leaders, no divorce and no theological questioning. In fact there was virtually no sin at all! God was happy. The Pope was happy. The people (those who were lucky enough to follow the Pope) were happy. There were libraries and university for all. Women were adored and treated with utmost respect. All children went to bed with food in their bellies and a sweet song on their lips.

Us moderns (starting with Luther I presume) ruined it all.
:lol: :lol:
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Post by UncleBob » Fri Aug 23, 2013 9:00 pm

*DAILY POST*

Chance of Rapture for 23 August 2013: 21%

Chance of HOMOSEXUAL Rapture for same date: Fabulous
"One man's theology is another man's belly laugh." - Robert A. Heinlein

"Many of the points here, taken to their logical conclusions, don't hold up to logic; they're simply Godded-up ways of saying "I don't like that." - Skip

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Post by Roadmaster » Fri Aug 23, 2013 10:54 pm

UncleBob wrote:Fabulous
:)
Image

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Post by Rusty » Fri Aug 23, 2013 11:15 pm

UncleBob wrote:*DAILY POST*

Chance of Rapture for 23 August 2013: 21%

Chance of HOMOSEXUAL Rapture for same date: Fabulous
Fabulous? fabulously small.... fabulously large ??? Which? you're being vague.

The Christians are having kittens thinking they've been left behind again. Meanwhile the gay think they've been snookered again. Unless... wait, are there gay bars in heaven? But I'm worried about Grape.

Oh btw you owe us a pile of reports for which you are tardy. But I would like to see a month with prob of rapture all zero. We know now right? It didn't occur.
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Post by Skip » Sat Aug 24, 2013 6:07 am

Roadmaster wrote:
UncleBob wrote:Fabulous
:)
Yup
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Post by hogleg » Sat Aug 24, 2013 9:11 am

UncleBob wrote:*DAILY POST*

Chance of Rapture for 23 August 2013: 21%

Chance of HOMOSEXUAL Rapture for same date: Fabulous
Best laugh today. Thanks!
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Post by UncleBob » Sat Aug 24, 2013 10:59 am

hogleg wrote:
UncleBob wrote:*DAILY POST*

Chance of Rapture for 23 August 2013: 21%

Chance of HOMOSEXUAL Rapture for same date: Fabulous
Best laugh today. Thanks!
Yer welcome!

:taco:
"One man's theology is another man's belly laugh." - Robert A. Heinlein

"Many of the points here, taken to their logical conclusions, don't hold up to logic; they're simply Godded-up ways of saying "I don't like that." - Skip

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Post by UncleBob » Sat Aug 24, 2013 11:00 am

*DAILY POST*

Chance of Rapture for 24 August 2013: 4%
"One man's theology is another man's belly laugh." - Robert A. Heinlein

"Many of the points here, taken to their logical conclusions, don't hold up to logic; they're simply Godded-up ways of saying "I don't like that." - Skip

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Post by Roadmaster » Sat Aug 24, 2013 11:11 am

UncleBob wrote:*DAILY POST*

Chance of Rapture for 24 August 2013: 4%
Fabulous
Image

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Post by Irish-Dane » Tue Aug 27, 2013 9:58 am

Roadmaster wrote:
UncleBob wrote:*DAILY POST*

Chance of Rapture for 24 August 2013: 4%
Fabulous
Yer doing it wrong. Add some flare.
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Post by infidel » Tue Aug 27, 2013 10:11 am

Irish-Dane wrote:
Roadmaster wrote:
UncleBob wrote:*DAILY POST*

Chance of Rapture for 24 August 2013: 4%
Fabulous
Yer doing it wrong. Add some flare.
Yer doing it wrong. Add some flair.
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Post by UncleBob » Tue Aug 27, 2013 11:43 am

infidel wrote:
Irish-Dane wrote:
Roadmaster wrote:
UncleBob wrote:*DAILY POST*

Chance of Rapture for 24 August 2013: 4%
Fabulous
Yer doing it wrong. Add some flare.
Yer doing it wrong. Add some flair.
==>Click Here<==

*DAILY POST*

Chance of Rapture for 27 August 2013: 61%
"One man's theology is another man's belly laugh." - Robert A. Heinlein

"Many of the points here, taken to their logical conclusions, don't hold up to logic; they're simply Godded-up ways of saying "I don't like that." - Skip

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