So, recently JimVH shipped me this monkey

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DepartedLight
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So, recently JimVH shipped me this monkey

Post by DepartedLight » Fri Oct 06, 2017 10:00 pm

We were conducting routine CPS estate pipe business, as we have in the past. Without incident.

In the packaging, as is Jim's want, he included a little add on. Sometimes it's a sample of tobacco, maybe a tamper, you get the idea.

This time it was a monkey. A monkey with a woot American flag themed cape and red cap. Said monkey had, yes had; not has, velcro on his front hands to wrap him around whatever you want.

I have to admit i was smitten by it's simplistic charm as i removed it from the box and straightened his cap and flattened his cape. I recall grinning. I Velcroed him to the handle on the stove. No good. Fridge door. Yeah. No.

One night, as I tried to figure out where the monkey could live in my house I got sick of it and tossed the monkey to the side. The dogs were not interested in destroying it. Safe.

Two days later I'm stumbling around trying to make coffee with one eye half opened and I step on that damn monkey. Annoyed, I kick slide it into the wall out of the way.

That was the first time I heard it scream.

I peed myself a little. And not in a good way.

In my obvious sudden alarm both dogs attacked the screaming monkey and rendered it a non-threat.

Good dogs.

JimVH is an evil bastard who has good taste in pipes.
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Re: So, recently JimVH shipped me this monkey

Post by hugodrax » Fri Oct 06, 2017 10:20 pm

You truly must donate your liver to science, rummie.
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Re: So, recently JimVH shipped me this monkey

Post by JimVH » Fri Oct 06, 2017 10:45 pm

Mission. Accomplished.
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Re: So, recently JimVH shipped me this monkey

Post by Gabriel » Fri Oct 06, 2017 11:24 pm

Mrs and I are laughing with tears over here.

Those monkeys are crazy loud and obnoxious...
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Re: So, recently JimVH shipped me this monkey

Post by hugodrax » Fri Oct 06, 2017 11:45 pm

Gabriel wrote:
Fri Oct 06, 2017 11:24 pm
Mrs and I are laughing with tears over here.

Those monkeys are crazy loud and obnoxious...
Those are two horrendous sentences. At least add the fourth period.
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Re: So, recently JimVH shipped me this monkey

Post by durangopipe » Sat Oct 07, 2017 12:11 am

hugodrax wrote:
Fri Oct 06, 2017 11:45 pm
Gabriel wrote:
Fri Oct 06, 2017 11:24 pm
Mrs and I are laughing with tears over here.

Those monkeys are crazy loud and obnoxious...
Those are two horrendous sentences. At least add the fourth period.
Terminal ellipsis sounds like an incurable disease.
I understand it crossed over to humans from foul-mouthed monkeys during a CIA experiment gone awry.
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Re: So, recently JimVH shipped me this monkey

Post by gaining_age » Sat Oct 07, 2017 7:37 am

So, you eventually "gave the monkey a hotdog".
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Re: So, recently JimVH shipped me this monkey

Post by Irish-Dane » Sat Oct 07, 2017 7:43 am

gaining_age wrote:
Sat Oct 07, 2017 7:37 am
So, you eventually "gave the monkey a hotdog".
:lol: :lol: :lol:
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Re: So, recently JimVH shipped me this monkey

Post by DepartedLight » Sat Oct 07, 2017 8:11 am

Irish-Dane wrote:
Sat Oct 07, 2017 7:43 am
gaining_age wrote:
Sat Oct 07, 2017 7:37 am
So, you eventually "gave the monkey a hotdog".
:lol: :lol: :lol:
two
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Re: So, recently JimVH shipped me this monkey

Post by Del » Sat Oct 07, 2017 6:02 pm

durangopipe wrote:
Sat Oct 07, 2017 12:11 am
hugodrax wrote:
Fri Oct 06, 2017 11:45 pm
Gabriel wrote:
Fri Oct 06, 2017 11:24 pm
Mrs and I are laughing with tears over here.

Those monkeys are crazy loud and obnoxious...
Those are two horrendous sentences. At least add the fourth period.
Terminal ellipsis sounds like an incurable disease.
I understand it crossed over to humans from foul-mouthed monkeys during a CIA experiment gone awry.
Never could kick the ellipsis monkey....
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Re: So, recently JimVH shipped me this monkey

Post by Steverino » Sun Oct 08, 2017 2:32 pm

I found this thread to be humorous; ergo, I approve of it.
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Re: So, recently JimVH shipped me this monkey

Post by JohnnyMcPiperson » Mon Oct 09, 2017 7:35 pm

I find it disturbing that DL was playing with Jim's monkey, all kinds of weird going on around here....


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Re: So, recently JimVH shipped me this monkey

Post by Fainn » Mon Oct 09, 2017 7:52 pm

JohnnyMcPiperson wrote:
Mon Oct 09, 2017 7:35 pm
I find it disturbing that DL was playing with Jim's monkey, all kinds of weird going on around here....


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:lol: I'm surprised I didn't catch that earlier.
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Re: So, recently JimVH shipped me this monkey

Post by Sir Moose » Mon Oct 09, 2017 7:54 pm

Fainn wrote:
Mon Oct 09, 2017 7:52 pm
JohnnyMcPiperson wrote:
Mon Oct 09, 2017 7:35 pm
I find it disturbing that DL was playing with Jim's monkey, all kinds of weird going on around here....


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:lol: I'm surprised I didn't catch that earlier.
Terminal ellipsis? I think you have to play with Jim's monkey to catch it.
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