Joel Osteen & John the Baptist; A Conversation

For those deep thinkers out there.

Moderator: tuttle

User avatar
Goose55
Del's Love Child
Del's Love Child
Posts: 5554
Joined: Thu Feb 11, 2016 6:44 pm
Location: Southern Arizona, U.S.A.

Joel Osteen & John the Baptist; A Conversation

Post by Goose55 » Tue Apr 05, 2016 8:11 pm

I am wondering what a conversation between Joel Osteen (the prosperity "gospel" preacher) and John the Baptist might be like.

Would Joel tell John the reason he is in a dungeon is because he had not done enough positive affirmations? Would Joel hand John a copy of Osteen's book, Your Best Life Now?

Has Osteen ever preached a sermon on John the Baptist?
"At present we're on the wrong side of the door. But all the pages of the New Testament are rustling with the rumor that it will not always be so." ~ C.S. Lewis

User avatar
Skip
Everything in Moderatoration
Everything in Moderatoration
Posts: 24182
Joined: Wed Mar 30, 2005 6:00 pm
Location: Slightly East of Pepik
Contact:

Re: Joel Osteen & John the Baptist; A Conversation

Post by Skip » Tue Apr 05, 2016 8:30 pm

Goose55 wrote:I am wondering what a conversation between Joel Osteen (the prosperity "gospel" preacher) and John the Baptist might be like.

Would Joel tell John the reason he is in a dungeon is because he had not done enough positive affirmations? Would Joel hand John a copy of Osteen's book, Your Best Life Now?

Has Osteen ever preached a sermon on John the Baptist?
Has Osteen ever preached a sermon that wasn't on Osteen?
(A unfair question, as I've never bothered listening to an Osteen sermon).
2012, 2013, 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017 Winner of the CPS Award: "Most Likely to be Found Without Pants at Any Given Moment"

2017 Curmudgeon of the Year

"No man is peer to Skip, peasant." -A_Morley

User avatar
Roadmaster
Ornery one-eyed tick farming weiner dog
Ornery one-eyed tick farming weiner dog
Posts: 12791
Joined: Sat Dec 29, 2007 6:00 pm
Location: Missouri The Show-me State

Re: Joel Osteen & John the Baptist; A Conversation

Post by Roadmaster » Wed Apr 06, 2016 10:29 am

I listen to Osteen from time to time and tend to think more positive about things afterwards.

How he can live with himself for taking money from those who do without basic things is beyond me however.
Current Superhero: Departed Light

User avatar
DepartedLight
That boy's got a Thorazine deficiency.
Posts: 26318
Joined: Thu Nov 19, 2009 6:00 pm
Location: Tobacco Fairy HQ, North Carolina

Re: Joel Osteen & John the Baptist; A Conversation

Post by DepartedLight » Wed Apr 06, 2016 11:55 am

"John? Is that a camel hair coat you're sporting? I gotta tell ya. That bad boy reeks. It's like I've said before, 'Be careful what you say. You can say something hurtful in ten seconds, but ten years later, the wounds are still there.' Well, you know, so long as you don't get beheaded for what you say. And this 'voice crying out in the wilderness' thing you got going on. Yeah. I dunno about that. I've always said, 'Don't use your words to describe the situation. Use your words to change the situation.' And you suck at both, man. mm-kay?"
DL Jake

you win the sneakiness award. » Bloodhound

User avatar
Jocose
a large Chinese man named Wu
a large Chinese man named Wu
Posts: 20032
Joined: Fri Jan 11, 2008 6:00 pm
Location: Moonbase Alpha
Contact:

Re: Joel Osteen & John the Baptist; A Conversation

Post by Jocose » Wed Apr 06, 2016 12:07 pm

The guy can fill a stadium.
"And for Freds sake, DO NOT point anyone towards CPS or you'll put them off of both Christianity and pipe smoking forever." ~ FredS

Image

User avatar
FredS
Really, really likes watching kids fish.
Really, really likes watching kids fish.
Posts: 20008
Joined: Sat Feb 21, 2009 6:00 pm
Location: NOCO (Northern Colorado)

Re: Joel Osteen & John the Baptist; A Conversation

Post by FredS » Wed Apr 06, 2016 12:28 pm

Jocose wrote:The guy can fill a stadium.
That says a whole lot more about the sorry & desperate souls buying tickets than it does about him.
"If we ever get to heaven boys, it aint because we aint done nothin' wrong" - Kris Kristofferson

"One of the things I love about CPS is the frank and enthusiastic dysfunction here. God help me, I do love it so." – OldWorldSwine

"I'd like to put a hook in that puppet and swing it through a bunch of salmon!" - durangopipe

User avatar
John-Boy
I'm a lover and I'm a sinner
I'm a lover and I'm a sinner
Posts: 32077
Joined: Sat Oct 11, 2003 6:00 pm
Contact:

Re: Joel Osteen & John the Baptist; A Conversation

Post by John-Boy » Thu Apr 07, 2016 6:20 am

If you're into Twitter, check out @StAugOsteen. It's a mash up of St. Augustine quotes with Joel Osteen quotes...
@StAugOsteen wrote:But hell, which is called a lake of fire and brimstone, will torment the bodies of the damned.

That's letting your light shine brightly.
Praying - coco
Sometimes memes can be helpful as well as humorous - Jocose
Yer mom is kindhearted and well respected in her community - JMG

User avatar
JudgeRusty
Didn't even get to wear his hat
Didn't even get to wear his hat
Posts: 6032
Joined: Tue Dec 13, 2011 6:00 pm
Location: VA

Re: Joel Osteen & John the Baptist; A Conversation

Post by JudgeRusty » Thu Apr 07, 2016 6:37 am

DepartedLight wrote:"John? Is that a camel hair coat you're sporting? I gotta tell ya. That bad boy reeks. It's like I've said before, 'Be careful what you say. You can say something hurtful in ten seconds, but ten years later, the wounds are still there.' Well, you know, so long as you don't get beheaded for what you say. And this 'voice crying out in the wilderness' thing you got going on. Yeah. I dunno about that. I've always said, 'Don't use your words to describe the situation. Use your words to change the situation.' And you suck at both, man. mm-kay?"
I'm not sure if JtB would knock some of Osteen's teeth out, but if I was in Osteen's shoes in the encounter, I would be nervous about that possibility.
Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal

User avatar
DepartedLight
That boy's got a Thorazine deficiency.
Posts: 26318
Joined: Thu Nov 19, 2009 6:00 pm
Location: Tobacco Fairy HQ, North Carolina

Re: Joel Osteen & John the Baptist; A Conversation

Post by DepartedLight » Thu Apr 07, 2016 6:51 am

JudgeRusty wrote:
DepartedLight wrote:"John? Is that a camel hair coat you're sporting? I gotta tell ya. That bad boy reeks. It's like I've said before, 'Be careful what you say. You can say something hurtful in ten seconds, but ten years later, the wounds are still there.' Well, you know, so long as you don't get beheaded for what you say. And this 'voice crying out in the wilderness' thing you got going on. Yeah. I dunno about that. I've always said, 'Don't use your words to describe the situation. Use your words to change the situation.' And you suck at both, man. mm-kay?"
I'm not sure if JtB would knock some of Osteen's teeth out, but if I was in Osteen's shoes in the encounter, I would be nervous about that possibility.
He does have a nice smile. I can see this point.
DL Jake

you win the sneakiness award. » Bloodhound

User avatar
Cleon
Brother of the Briar
Brother of the Briar
Posts: 14142
Joined: Thu Sep 03, 2009 6:00 pm
Location: Indiana - South of 40
Contact:

Re: Joel Osteen & John the Baptist; A Conversation

Post by Cleon » Thu Apr 07, 2016 7:40 am

DepartedLight wrote:
JudgeRusty wrote:
DepartedLight wrote:"John? Is that a camel hair coat you're sporting? I gotta tell ya. That bad boy reeks. It's like I've said before, 'Be careful what you say. You can say something hurtful in ten seconds, but ten years later, the wounds are still there.' Well, you know, so long as you don't get beheaded for what you say. And this 'voice crying out in the wilderness' thing you got going on. Yeah. I dunno about that. I've always said, 'Don't use your words to describe the situation. Use your words to change the situation.' And you suck at both, man. mm-kay?"
I'm not sure if JtB would knock some of Osteen's teeth out, but if I was in Osteen's shoes in the encounter, I would be nervous about that possibility.
He does have a nice smile. I can see this point.
Image
"Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of heaven" - Jesus

"More people need to put their big boy britches on." - JMG

"Dang, a pipe slap." - JimVH

User avatar
coco
Uniquely Duggish
Uniquely Duggish
Posts: 27550
Joined: Sun Feb 01, 2009 6:00 pm
Location: Sweet Home Alabama
Contact:

Re: Joel Osteen & John the Baptist; A Conversation

Post by coco » Thu Apr 07, 2016 8:01 am

You brood of vipers! Who warned you to flee from the wrath to come?... Even now the axe is laid to the root of the trees. Every tree therefore that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire.

I baptize you with water for repentance, but he who is coming after me is mightier than I, whose sandals I am not worthy to carry. He will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and fire. His winnowing fork is in his hand, and he will clear his threshing floor and gather his wheat into the barn, but the chaff he will burn with unquenchable fire.”
"Like a gold ring in a pig's snout is a cob with a forever lucite stem." (Pipverbs 1:1)
"No more signatures that quote other CPS members." - Thunk

User avatar
JimVH
Ramone, the hair dresser with smokin' diapers
Ramone, the hair dresser with smokin' diapers
Posts: 20656
Joined: Sun May 18, 2008 6:00 pm
Location: I wasn't born in Texas, but I got here as soon as I could.
Contact:

Re: Joel Osteen & John the Baptist; A Conversation

Post by JimVH » Thu Apr 07, 2016 8:20 am

All this Jesus stuff is unnecessary as long as you feel good about yourself - JO
Image

User avatar
durangopipe
Under-secretary to the Minister of Pipe Breaking
Under-secretary to the Minister of Pipe Breaking
Posts: 4858
Joined: Wed Jan 20, 2016 3:58 pm
Location: Southwest Colorado

Re: Joel Osteen & John the Baptist; A Conversation

Post by durangopipe » Thu Apr 07, 2016 11:49 am

So the point of becoming a follower of Jesus is to be materially prosperous on this earth. Boy, am I glad to learn that.

Gonna rip the page with this out of my KJV:
Jesus said to him, "go, sell your belongings and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow Me."

Even the NAS got it wrong:
Jesus said to him, "If you wish to be complete, go and sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow Me."

Clearly cases of bad translation. My Greek is very poor, but I think it's supposed to read, "Send more money to Joel, and buy his books and you'll have more treasure on earth (and better teeth). Why wait?"
The most improper job of any man, even saints, is bossing other men. Not one in a million is fit for it, and least of all those who seek the opportunity.. J.R.R. Tolkien

2017 Morley - Outstanding BRATASS of the Year

User avatar
Goose55
Del's Love Child
Del's Love Child
Posts: 5554
Joined: Thu Feb 11, 2016 6:44 pm
Location: Southern Arizona, U.S.A.

Re: Joel Osteen & John the Baptist; A Conversation

Post by Goose55 » Thu Apr 07, 2016 8:40 pm

DepartedLight wrote:"John? Is that a camel hair coat you're sporting? I gotta tell ya. That bad boy reeks. It's like I've said before, 'Be careful what you say. You can say something hurtful in ten seconds, but ten years later, the wounds are still there.' Well, you know, so long as you don't get beheaded for what you say. And this 'voice crying out in the wilderness' thing you got going on. Yeah. I dunno about that. I've always said, 'Don't use your words to describe the situation. Use your words to change the situation.' And you suck at both, man. mm-kay?"
Very good take on the thread topic.

People like feel good messages, especially if they are inclined to "set up" on their own, which is what Osteen's so called theology encourages people to do.

"Setting up on own own" is what Adam & Eve did.
"At present we're on the wrong side of the door. But all the pages of the New Testament are rustling with the rumor that it will not always be so." ~ C.S. Lewis

User avatar
Goose55
Del's Love Child
Del's Love Child
Posts: 5554
Joined: Thu Feb 11, 2016 6:44 pm
Location: Southern Arizona, U.S.A.

Re: Joel Osteen & John the Baptist; A Conversation

Post by Goose55 » Thu Apr 07, 2016 8:43 pm

JimVH wrote:All this Jesus stuff is unnecessary as long as you feel good about yourself - JO
Wow. Osteen said that? Not good.
"At present we're on the wrong side of the door. But all the pages of the New Testament are rustling with the rumor that it will not always be so." ~ C.S. Lewis

User avatar
JimVH
Ramone, the hair dresser with smokin' diapers
Ramone, the hair dresser with smokin' diapers
Posts: 20656
Joined: Sun May 18, 2008 6:00 pm
Location: I wasn't born in Texas, but I got here as soon as I could.
Contact:

Re: Joel Osteen & John the Baptist; A Conversation

Post by JimVH » Thu Apr 07, 2016 8:45 pm

Goose55 wrote:
JimVH wrote:All this Jesus stuff is unnecessary as long as you feel good about yourself - JO
Wow. Osteen said that? Not good.
Not a quote, just my impression of his theology.
Image

User avatar
FredS
Really, really likes watching kids fish.
Really, really likes watching kids fish.
Posts: 20008
Joined: Sat Feb 21, 2009 6:00 pm
Location: NOCO (Northern Colorado)

Re: Joel Osteen & John the Baptist; A Conversation

Post by FredS » Fri Apr 08, 2016 12:47 pm

Osteen and his ilk are responsible for crap like this. People actully passing this nonsense around because they totally believe this junk. I am not saying God can't or won't help us financially or in any other area He sees fit, but to expect Him to move based on a FB post is ridiculous. Because yeah, when my children need/want my help I prefer they let me know via FB instead of simply coming to talk to me in person.

Image
"If we ever get to heaven boys, it aint because we aint done nothin' wrong" - Kris Kristofferson

"One of the things I love about CPS is the frank and enthusiastic dysfunction here. God help me, I do love it so." – OldWorldSwine

"I'd like to put a hook in that puppet and swing it through a bunch of salmon!" - durangopipe

User avatar
Goose55
Del's Love Child
Del's Love Child
Posts: 5554
Joined: Thu Feb 11, 2016 6:44 pm
Location: Southern Arizona, U.S.A.

Re: Joel Osteen & John the Baptist; A Conversation

Post by Goose55 » Sun Apr 10, 2016 11:29 pm

Touching on Osteen's book, Your Best Life Now: John MacArthur exegeses 1 Peter 1:3-5 in his sermon "Your Best Life, Now or Later?" .....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vZ7GnHb ... 364.879569
"At present we're on the wrong side of the door. But all the pages of the New Testament are rustling with the rumor that it will not always be so." ~ C.S. Lewis

User avatar
Thoth
Never had a corndog taco shake
Never had a corndog taco shake
Posts: 12119
Joined: Thu Dec 27, 2007 6:00 pm
Location: Jersey City, World's Greatest City
Contact:

Re: Joel Osteen & John the Baptist; A Conversation

Post by Thoth » Tue Apr 12, 2016 10:22 am

durangopipe wrote:So the point of becoming a follower of Jesus is to be materially prosperous on this earth. Boy, am I glad to learn that.
Same here but then Jesus owes me big time then; but since it Jesus and all I'll knock some of what he owes, so I'll settle just for 2 new cars, no need for luxury import would be perfectly fine with mid-level American sedans since i'm humble like that, and 4 bedroom 3 bath house some where with a good school district :P
"Go and reconcile with him who has trespassed against you before he comes and apologises to you and steals your crown" - H.H. Pope Cyril VI<br><br>"O Lord I was not aware of the treasure within me that is You" - H.H. Pope Shenouda III

User avatar
Goose55
Del's Love Child
Del's Love Child
Posts: 5554
Joined: Thu Feb 11, 2016 6:44 pm
Location: Southern Arizona, U.S.A.

Re: Joel Osteen & John the Baptist; A Conversation

Post by Goose55 » Sun Apr 24, 2016 3:10 pm

Thinking today, again about this topic, I was reminded of the words of Isaiah......

Isaiah 30:10
"Which say to the seers, See not; and to the prophets, Prophesy not unto us right things, speak unto us smooth things, prophesy deceits."

Osteen is pretty smooth and people love to hear anything which encourages them to "set up on their own" in this life. Just as A&E did.
"At present we're on the wrong side of the door. But all the pages of the New Testament are rustling with the rumor that it will not always be so." ~ C.S. Lewis

Post Reply