Red River Shootout

The part of the church where the silliest things happen. Conversations that sound like they belong in the youth room will be moved here.
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serapion
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Post by serapion » Fri Oct 11, 2013 3:39 pm

Now I have almost NO interest in football and find this whole thing somewhere between amusing and disturbing.

That said as I hear it, UT doesn't stand a chance.
So sad with the new Big Tex looking on and all.
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Post by TwoXseveN » Fri Oct 11, 2013 3:50 pm

This thread makes me happy.

I love college football/all sporting rivalries.
I used to be 'sassy' but got downgraded.
Don't tell Hugo.

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Post by JimVH » Fri Oct 11, 2013 5:14 pm

What does an OU player call a UT player after graduation?



Boss.
"The days that I keep my gratitude higher than my expectations, I have really good days." Ray Wylie Hubbard

"The easiest way to digest success is through gratitude." Matthew McConaughey

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Post by CodeMonkey » Fri Oct 11, 2013 5:59 pm

A UT professor was complaining to the football coach about how dumb the players were. The coach asked what he meant. The quarterback happened to walk by at that time. The professor asked the quarterback to run over to his office and see if he was there. The quarterback took off running. He came back in about ten minutes and said ‘No sir, you are not there’. The coach said I see what you mean I would have called to see if you were there.
“Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you enjoy the play” – Newspaper reporter.

"Trying is the first step towards failure" - Homer Simpson

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Post by JimVH » Fri Oct 11, 2013 7:14 pm

New Book:

Escaping Victory
The History of the OU Football Program
"The days that I keep my gratitude higher than my expectations, I have really good days." Ray Wylie Hubbard

"The easiest way to digest success is through gratitude." Matthew McConaughey

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Post by UncleBob » Fri Oct 11, 2013 7:20 pm

Some OU football payers were helping with Habitat for Humanity. Their coach walked by and noticed that while they were roofing, they would take out a nail, look at it, and throw it away. The coach yelled up, "What do you think you are doing?"

The OU Quarterback yelled down, "The head is on the wrong side of the nail!"

The coach yelled back, "You idiot! Those are for the OTHER side of the roof!"
"One man's theology is another man's belly laugh." - Robert A. Heinlein

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Post by CodeMonkey » Fri Oct 11, 2013 7:45 pm

Q. How do you light up UT football players eyes?
A. Shine a flashlight in their ear.
“Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you enjoy the play” – Newspaper reporter.

"Trying is the first step towards failure" - Homer Simpson

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Post by JimVH » Fri Oct 11, 2013 8:15 pm

Did you hear about the OU player that was so dumb he thought menopause was a button on the TV remote?
"The days that I keep my gratitude higher than my expectations, I have really good days." Ray Wylie Hubbard

"The easiest way to digest success is through gratitude." Matthew McConaughey

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Post by CodeMonkey » Fri Oct 11, 2013 8:19 pm

Q. How do you confuse a Texas football player?
A. You can’t, they are always like that.
“Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you enjoy the play” – Newspaper reporter.

"Trying is the first step towards failure" - Homer Simpson

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Post by JimVH » Fri Oct 11, 2013 8:23 pm

What do you call an OU player with an IQ of 50?


Gifted.
"The days that I keep my gratitude higher than my expectations, I have really good days." Ray Wylie Hubbard

"The easiest way to digest success is through gratitude." Matthew McConaughey

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Post by UncleBob » Fri Oct 11, 2013 8:24 pm

What's the difference between OU and a broken vacuum cleaner?

OU still sucks!

:taco:
"One man's theology is another man's belly laugh." - Robert A. Heinlein

"Many of the points here, taken to their logical conclusions, don't hold up to logic; they're simply Godded-up ways of saying "I don't like that." - Skip

"Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please." -Mark Twain

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Post by CodeMonkey » Sat Oct 12, 2013 9:55 am

Q. Why do UT players hate to give their cat a bath?
A. It takes too long to get the fur off of their tongues.
“Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you enjoy the play” – Newspaper reporter.

"Trying is the first step towards failure" - Homer Simpson

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Post by JimVH » Sat Oct 12, 2013 10:18 am

After graduation, an OU player gets a job as a Jr. High coach. After school one day, he notices a boy in the field standing alone, while all the other kids are running around having fun.

He takes pity on him and decides to speak to the boy.

‘You ok?’ he says.

‘Yes.’ the boy says.

‘You can go and play with the other kids you know.’ he says.

‘It’s best I stay here,’ the boy says.’

‘Why?’, asks the coach.

The boy says: ‘Because, I’m the goalie.’
"The days that I keep my gratitude higher than my expectations, I have really good days." Ray Wylie Hubbard

"The easiest way to digest success is through gratitude." Matthew McConaughey

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Post by JimVH » Sat Oct 12, 2013 11:26 am

Anyone watching the game?
"The days that I keep my gratitude higher than my expectations, I have really good days." Ray Wylie Hubbard

"The easiest way to digest success is through gratitude." Matthew McConaughey

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Post by CodeMonkey » Sat Oct 12, 2013 11:33 am

Not me, but I did see the score. It looks like OU is using the classic Mohammed Ali rope-a-dope ploy.
:lol:
“Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you enjoy the play” – Newspaper reporter.

"Trying is the first step towards failure" - Homer Simpson

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Post by JimVH » Sat Oct 12, 2013 11:36 am

CodeMonkey wrote:Not me, but I did see the score. It looks like OU is using the classic Mohammed Ali rope-a-dope ploy.
:lol:
OU is starting to show a little fire now. Looks like we might have a good game.
"The days that I keep my gratitude higher than my expectations, I have really good days." Ray Wylie Hubbard

"The easiest way to digest success is through gratitude." Matthew McConaughey

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Post by TwoXseveN » Sat Oct 12, 2013 12:38 pm

JimVH wrote:Anyone watching the game?
Who's playing?

:lol:
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Post by UncleBob » Sat Oct 12, 2013 1:07 pm

HA-ha! D Line rooles! QB drools!
"One man's theology is another man's belly laugh." - Robert A. Heinlein

"Many of the points here, taken to their logical conclusions, don't hold up to logic; they're simply Godded-up ways of saying "I don't like that." - Skip

"Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please." -Mark Twain

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Post by CodeMonkey » Sat Oct 12, 2013 1:45 pm

I concede that Texas was the best team today. I yield to your superiority. May I humbly ask that we be in fellowship again and enjoy the bonds of brotherhood?
“Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you enjoy the play” – Newspaper reporter.

"Trying is the first step towards failure" - Homer Simpson

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Post by JimVH » Sat Oct 12, 2013 2:23 pm

CodeMonkey wrote:I concede that Texas was the best team today. I yield to your superiority. May I humbly ask that we be in fellowship again and enjoy the bonds of brotherhood?
If I were a betting man I would not have put any money on UT today, but they showed-up after all.

This thread was more fun than watching the game. I look forward to its resurrection next year.
"The days that I keep my gratitude higher than my expectations, I have really good days." Ray Wylie Hubbard

"The easiest way to digest success is through gratitude." Matthew McConaughey

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