2019 Calandar

The part of the church where the silliest things happen. Conversations that sound like they belong in the youth room will be moved here.
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durangopipe
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Re: 2019 Calandar

Post by durangopipe » Sun Jan 27, 2019 6:16 pm

You’ll never be as lazy as whoever named the fireplace.
. . . be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:32 (NKJV)

The most improper job of any man, even saints, is bossing other men. Not one in a million is fit for it, and least of all those who seek the opportunity.. J.R.R. Tolkien

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Sir Moose
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Re: 2019 Calandar

Post by Sir Moose » Sun Jan 27, 2019 8:19 pm

durangopipe wrote:
Sun Jan 27, 2019 6:16 pm
You’ll never be as lazy as whoever named the fireplace.
Image
In theory, theory and practice are the same. In practice, they are not.

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durangopipe
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Re: 2019 Calandar

Post by durangopipe » Sun Jan 27, 2019 9:48 pm

Sir Moose wrote:
Sun Jan 27, 2019 8:19 pm
durangopipe wrote:
Sun Jan 27, 2019 6:16 pm
You’ll never be as lazy as whoever named the fireplace.
Image
Okay.
Call it a tie.
. . . be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:32 (NKJV)

The most improper job of any man, even saints, is bossing other men. Not one in a million is fit for it, and least of all those who seek the opportunity.. J.R.R. Tolkien

2017 Morley - Outstanding BRATASS of the Year

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UncleBob
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Re: 2019 Calandar

Post by UncleBob » Mon Jan 28, 2019 9:38 am

durangopipe wrote:
Sun Jan 27, 2019 9:48 pm
Sir Moose wrote:
Sun Jan 27, 2019 8:19 pm
durangopipe wrote:
Sun Jan 27, 2019 6:16 pm
You’ll never be as lazy as whoever named the fireplace.
Image
Okay.
Call it a tie.
I see what you did there.

Image
"One man's theology is another man's belly laugh." - Robert A. Heinlein

"Many of the points here, taken to their logical conclusions, don't hold up to logic; they're simply Godded-up ways of saying "I don't like that." - Skip

"Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please." -Mark Twain

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durangopipe
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Re: 2019 Calandar

Post by durangopipe » Mon Jan 28, 2019 9:42 am

UncleBob wrote:
Mon Jan 28, 2019 9:38 am
durangopipe wrote:
Sun Jan 27, 2019 9:48 pm
Sir Moose wrote:
Sun Jan 27, 2019 8:19 pm
durangopipe wrote:
Sun Jan 27, 2019 6:16 pm
You’ll never be as lazy as whoever named the fireplace.
Image
Okay.
Call it a tie.
I see what you did there.

Image
:lol:
. . . be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:32 (NKJV)

The most improper job of any man, even saints, is bossing other men. Not one in a million is fit for it, and least of all those who seek the opportunity.. J.R.R. Tolkien

2017 Morley - Outstanding BRATASS of the Year

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Winton
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Re: 2019 Calandar

Post by Winton » Mon Jan 28, 2019 4:47 pm

What has a horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.

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Winton
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Re: 2019 Calandar

Post by Winton » Tue Jan 29, 2019 6:42 am

Did you hear about the calendar thief?

He got 12 months.

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Sir Moose
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Re: 2019 Calandar

Post by Sir Moose » Tue Jan 29, 2019 9:55 pm

Winton wrote:
Tue Jan 29, 2019 6:42 am
Did you hear about the calendar thief?

He got 12 months.
He also got a date....with his cellmate, Bubba.
In theory, theory and practice are the same. In practice, they are not.

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Winton
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Re: 2019 Calandar

Post by Winton » Wed Jan 30, 2019 7:45 am

Dad, will you fix dinner?

I didn't know it was broken!

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Re: 2019 Calandar

Post by Winton » Thu Jan 31, 2019 8:06 am

At what time do most people go to the dentist?

At tooth-hurty.

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Re: 2019 Calandar

Post by Winton » Fri Feb 01, 2019 6:06 am

Can February march?

No, but April may.

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Winton
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Re: 2019 Calandar

Post by Winton » Tue Feb 05, 2019 12:12 pm

The cops just arrested the Energizer Bunny!

They charged him with battery.

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Re: 2019 Calandar

Post by Winton » Tue Feb 05, 2019 12:13 pm

How can you tell if a snake is a baby snake?

It has a rattle.

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Winton
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Re: 2019 Calandar

Post by Winton » Tue Feb 05, 2019 12:14 pm

Did you hear about the doughnut maker retiring? He was fed up with the hole business.

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Re: 2019 Calandar

Post by Winton » Thu Feb 07, 2019 7:04 am

Why did the electrician close early on Monday?

Because business was very light.

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Winton
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Re: 2019 Calandar

Post by Winton » Thu Feb 07, 2019 7:05 am

What kind of car does a crazy man drive?

A locomotive.

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Winton
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Re: 2019 Calandar

Post by Winton » Fri Feb 08, 2019 7:25 am

What did the first stoplight say to the second stoplight?

Don't look! I'm changing!

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Winton
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Re: 2019 Calandar

Post by Winton » Fri Feb 08, 2019 7:26 am

On Facebook today: People cheating on their taxes disgust me. This is not the world I want to raise my 23 dependents in!

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Winton
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Re: 2019 Calandar

Post by Winton » Sat Feb 09, 2019 5:41 pm

I got a big bill from the electric company this month.

I was shocked.

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Re: 2019 Calandar

Post by Winton » Mon Feb 11, 2019 9:13 am

I had a dream that I was a muffler last night.

I woke up exhausted!

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