TTCMA: Things That Chap My Ass

The part of the church where the silliest things happen. Conversations that sound like they belong in the youth room will be moved here.
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TTCMA: Things That Chap My Ass

Post by wosbald » Sun Sep 22, 2019 1:58 pm

+JMJ+

2-ply toilet paper with the plies misaligned.

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Re: TTCMA: Things That Chap My Ass

Post by Jocose » Sun Sep 22, 2019 2:40 pm

Take the one ply that is off and wind it backwards one full turn to get it back in alignment.
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Re: TTCMA: Things That Chap My Ass

Post by arank87 » Sun Sep 22, 2019 3:48 pm

When my wife buys 2 ply toilet paper. Scrimp somewhere else!
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Re: TTCMA: Things That Chap My Ass

Post by wosbald » Wed Jan 08, 2020 5:42 pm

+JMJ+

Noone cares anymore.

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Re: TTCMA: Things That Chap My Ass

Post by JimVH » Wed Jan 08, 2020 6:46 pm

wosbald wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 5:42 pm
+JMJ+

Noone cares anymore.
Not true. I happen to know that Noone loves you.
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Re: TTCMA: Things That Chap My Ass

Post by AnungUnRama » Wed Jan 08, 2020 7:14 pm

I am on septic and with my family size it sees heavy use. 2 ply is not an option.

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Re: TTCMA: Things That Chap My Ass

Post by Adam Z » Wed Jan 08, 2020 7:16 pm

Hemorrhoids

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Re: TTCMA: Things That Chap My Ass

Post by AnungUnRama » Wed Jan 08, 2020 7:17 pm

Adam Z wrote:Hemorrhoids

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Those things are a bloody pain in the a$$.

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Re: TTCMA: Things That Chap My Ass

Post by Goose55 » Wed Jan 08, 2020 7:24 pm

I use a bidet. Squeaky clean spotless.
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Re: TTCMA: Things That Chap My Ass

Post by Fainn » Wed Jan 08, 2020 9:13 pm

Goose55 wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 7:24 pm
I use a bidet.
You would.
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Re: TTCMA: Things That Chap My Ass

Post by hugodrax » Wed Jan 08, 2020 9:27 pm

Fainn wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 9:13 pm
Goose55 wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 7:24 pm
I use a bidet.
You would.
You should.
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Re: TTCMA: Things That Chap My Ass

Post by arank87 » Wed Jan 08, 2020 9:42 pm

hugodrax wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 9:27 pm
Fainn wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 9:13 pm
Goose55 wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 7:24 pm
I use a bidet.
You would.
You should.
Well, I had a screed all ready about a bidet being a fine idea and all but far too expensive. Who, I thought, has bidet money? Is it 2007?? But (pun intended) I thought 'maybe there's a better way." And sure enough, there is. https://hellotushy.com/products/warm-wa ... -tushy-spa $109 for a bidet? Kind of interesting. I mean, we all know toilet paper is neither effective nor hygienic. Food for thought.
“A true Lutheran relies on God’s Word and would not worry about it even if the whole world mocked and despised him for it. He does not consider the world an authority in religious matters. He rests his faith on higher authority.” C.F.W. Walther

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Re: TTCMA: Things That Chap My Ass

Post by coco » Wed Jan 08, 2020 9:56 pm

The forum software.
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Re: TTCMA: Things That Chap My Ass

Post by Adam Z » Wed Jan 08, 2020 10:12 pm


arank87 wrote:
hugodrax wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 9:27 pm
Fainn wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 9:13 pm
Goose55 wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 7:24 pm
I use a bidet.
You would.
You should.
Well, I had a screed all ready about a bidet being a fine idea and all but far too expensive. Who, I thought, has bidet money? Is it 2007?? But (pun intended) I thought 'maybe there's a better way." And sure enough, there is. https://hellotushy.com/products/warm-wa ... -tushy-spa $109 for a bidet? Kind of interesting. I mean, we all know toilet paper is neither effective nor hygienic. Food for thought.
After a bit of reading on the subject, now I'm thinking of getting a bidet for the house.

Only half kidding.

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Re: TTCMA: Things That Chap My Ass

Post by arank87 » Wed Jan 08, 2020 10:19 pm

Adam Z wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 10:12 pm
arank87 wrote:
hugodrax wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 9:27 pm
Fainn wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 9:13 pm
Goose55 wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 7:24 pm
I use a bidet.
You would.
You should.
Well, I had a screed all ready about a bidet being a fine idea and all but far too expensive. Who, I thought, has bidet money? Is it 2007?? But (pun intended) I thought 'maybe there's a better way." And sure enough, there is. https://hellotushy.com/products/warm-wa ... -tushy-spa $109 for a bidet? Kind of interesting. I mean, we all know toilet paper is neither effective nor hygienic. Food for thought.
After a bit of reading on the subject, now I'm thinking of getting a bidet for the house.

Only half kidding.

Sent from my Pixel 2 using Tapatalk
Yeah, I'm right there. Already told my wife. She said "go to bed stop bothering me" so, I think I'm very close.
“A true Lutheran relies on God’s Word and would not worry about it even if the whole world mocked and despised him for it. He does not consider the world an authority in religious matters. He rests his faith on higher authority.” C.F.W. Walther

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Re: TTCMA: Things That Chap My Ass

Post by AnungUnRama » Thu Jan 09, 2020 1:10 am

Adam Z wrote:
arank87 wrote:
hugodrax wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 9:27 pm
Fainn wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 9:13 pm
Goose55 wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 7:24 pm
I use a bidet.
You would.
You should.
Well, I had a screed all ready about a bidet being a fine idea and all but far too expensive. Who, I thought, has bidet money? Is it 2007?? But (pun intended) I thought 'maybe there's a better way." And sure enough, there is. https://hellotushy.com/products/warm-wa ... -tushy-spa $109 for a bidet? Kind of interesting. I mean, we all know toilet paper is neither effective nor hygienic. Food for thought.
After a bit of reading on the subject, now I'm thinking of getting a bidet for the house.

Only half kidding.

Sent from my Pixel 2 using Tapatalk
My folks got one. I didn't click on this link so maybe it is the same thing but it hooked up to their existing john somehow.

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Re: TTCMA: Things That Chap My Ass

Post by Goose55 » Thu Jan 09, 2020 7:02 am

This is the one I have. It's hand held and very well, handmade in Bakersfield, CA. I have had mine now for at least 6 or 7 years and doesn't leak a drop. The valve to turn on the water pressure is easily reached while on the toilet and the device easily hangs on the toilet paper dispenser spool.

https://hydrawand.com/

They also now make a thermostatic valve kit for the ultimate experience. One can adjust and preset the temperature of the water so you don't freeze your butt.

https://hydrawand.com/product/bidet-the ... valve-kit/
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Re: TTCMA: Things That Chap My Ass

Post by Stanley76 » Thu Jan 09, 2020 7:21 am

arank87 wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 9:42 pm
hugodrax wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 9:27 pm
Fainn wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 9:13 pm
Goose55 wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 7:24 pm
I use a bidet.
You would.
You should.
Well, I had a screed all ready about a bidet being a fine idea and all but far too expensive. Who, I thought, has bidet money? Is it 2007?? But (pun intended) I thought 'maybe there's a better way." And sure enough, there is. https://hellotushy.com/products/warm-wa ... -tushy-spa $109 for a bidet? Kind of interesting. I mean, we all know toilet paper is neither effective nor hygienic. Food for thought.
I've never used a bidet but it does sound more effective than Charmin. After all, if you got mud on your boots would you just wipe them off with soft paper or wash them off with water?
"'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'; and, 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'"

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Re: TTCMA: Things That Chap My Ass

Post by Stanley76 » Thu Jan 09, 2020 7:24 am

Sears and Roebuck catalog pages and corn cobs. The Romans used to have big public bench toilets and they used community sponges on a stick to clean up. Sounds unsanitary to me.
"'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'; and, 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'"

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Re: TTCMA: Things That Chap My Ass

Post by Goose55 » Thu Jan 09, 2020 7:38 am

Fainn wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 9:13 pm
Goose55 wrote:
Wed Jan 08, 2020 7:24 pm
I use a bidet.
You would.
You could.
"At present we're on the wrong side of the door. But all the pages of the New Testament are rustling with the rumor that it will not always be so." ~ C.S. Lewis

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