Absolutely Useless Facts About Yourself, No One Cares About

The part of the church where the silliest things happen. Conversations that sound like they belong in the youth room will be moved here.
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hugodrax
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Re: Absolutely Useless Facts About Yourself, No One Cares About

Post by hugodrax » Sun Jan 06, 2019 9:19 pm

sweetandsour wrote:
Sun Jan 06, 2019 8:47 pm
hugodrax wrote:
Sun Jan 06, 2019 8:32 pm
sweetandsour wrote:
Sun Jan 06, 2019 8:03 pm
Hovannes wrote:
Sun Jan 06, 2019 7:24 pm
sweetandsour wrote:
Sun Jan 06, 2019 6:16 pm
Just got home from a south Texas bird hunt. The weekend of 12s - room 12, table 12, $12 cfs dinners, bagged 12 birds, and filled up at pump 12 on the way home, on the 12th day of Christmas. My buddy and I both bought a lotto ticket.
12 gauge?
No, we were both shooting 20 gauges. You're getting off track, here. But, they both had two barrels, so each held 2 shells. So, 20+20+2+2+2+2=48, which is divisible by 12. Now we're getting back to the lotto ticket.
I never left. Why didn’t you play “72”?
Is that dominoes? We play 42 in Texas. But not this weekend. Btw, total miles walked, per our fitbit was 12.
Six twelves are seventy-two. But now we learn there were seven. You need to play the number 84, you see. Numerology is a mystical thing. Perhaps you weren’t being told to play 12, but the sum of all the 12’s you experienced.

I remember going on a camping trip where it seemed everyone we ran across was either looney or an amputee. I was so worried about losing a limb that I neglected my mental health. You are effected by this oversight on my part. Go play the number 84, just to be safe. :D
Notre Dame de Paris, priez pour nous y comprise les Jesuites.

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Re: Absolutely Useless Facts About Yourself, No One Cares About

Post by Cleon » Mon Jan 07, 2019 9:01 am

Hmmm. Something's different.
"Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of heaven" - Jesus

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Re: Absolutely Useless Facts About Yourself, No One Cares About

Post by DepartedLight » Mon Jan 07, 2019 9:09 am

hugodrax wrote: ... I remember going on a camping trip where it seemed everyone we ran across was either looney or an amputee.
:rotfl:
DL Jake

Feel free to use that quote in your signature. Stanley76 » 22 Feb 2019 21:50

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Re: Absolutely Useless Facts About Yourself, No One Cares About

Post by DepartedLight » Mon Jan 07, 2019 9:09 am

Cleon wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 9:01 am
Hmmm. Something's different.
YES!
DL Jake

Feel free to use that quote in your signature. Stanley76 » 22 Feb 2019 21:50

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FredS
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Re: Absolutely Useless Facts About Yourself, No One Cares About

Post by FredS » Mon Jan 07, 2019 9:24 am

The town next to mine is named Loveland. Really. They set up a special sub-station for a re-mailing program where you can send cards and letters to get them postmarked from Loveland. Kinda cool in a sappy sort of way.
"If we ever get to heaven boys, it aint because we aint done nothin' wrong" - Kris Kristofferson

"One of the things I love about CPS is the frank and enthusiastic dysfunction here. God help me, I do love it so." – OldWorldSwine

"I'd like to put a hook in that puppet and swing it through a bunch of salmon!" - durangopipe

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Re: Absolutely Useless Facts About Yourself, No One Cares About

Post by FredS » Mon Jan 07, 2019 11:39 am

I resolve to not reply to Uncle Bob or NoaM in the opt in threads. No matter how wrong they are.

We shall see.
"If we ever get to heaven boys, it aint because we aint done nothin' wrong" - Kris Kristofferson

"One of the things I love about CPS is the frank and enthusiastic dysfunction here. God help me, I do love it so." – OldWorldSwine

"I'd like to put a hook in that puppet and swing it through a bunch of salmon!" - durangopipe

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Re: Absolutely Useless Facts About Yourself, No One Cares About

Post by hugodrax » Mon Jan 07, 2019 12:06 pm

FredS wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 11:39 am
I resolve to not reply to Uncle Bob or NoaM in the opt in threads. No matter how wrong they are.

We shall see.
Sir, Hugo 1.2 has a little advice for Fred 2.0: the problem with resolutions is they can lead to Despair. Make attempts, but do not make vows.
Notre Dame de Paris, priez pour nous y comprise les Jesuites.

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Re: Absolutely Useless Facts About Yourself, No One Cares About

Post by FredS » Mon Jan 07, 2019 12:16 pm

hugodrax wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 12:06 pm
FredS wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 11:39 am
I resolve to not reply to Uncle Bob or NoaM in the opt in threads. No matter how wrong they are.

We shall see.
Sir, Hugo 1.2 has a little advice for Fred 2.0: the problem with resolutions is they can lead to Despair. Make attempts, but do not make vows.
At ease friend. Nothing on CPS besides a few of the prayer requests leads me to despair. I don't care enough about any of you jackwads to despair over what you write.

No drama for this momma.
"If we ever get to heaven boys, it aint because we aint done nothin' wrong" - Kris Kristofferson

"One of the things I love about CPS is the frank and enthusiastic dysfunction here. God help me, I do love it so." – OldWorldSwine

"I'd like to put a hook in that puppet and swing it through a bunch of salmon!" - durangopipe

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Re: Absolutely Useless Facts About Yourself, No One Cares About

Post by hugodrax » Mon Jan 07, 2019 12:32 pm

FredS wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 12:16 pm
hugodrax wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 12:06 pm
FredS wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 11:39 am
I resolve to not reply to Uncle Bob or NoaM in the opt in threads. No matter how wrong they are.

We shall see.
Sir, Hugo 1.2 has a little advice for Fred 2.0: the problem with resolutions is they can lead to Despair. Make attempts, but do not make vows.
At ease friend. Nothing on CPS besides a few of the prayer requests leads me to despair. I don't care enough about any of you jackwads to despair over what you write.

No drama for this momma.
Lol.

I never opted in. I thought it was a foolproof plan. It wasn't.
:lol:
Notre Dame de Paris, priez pour nous y comprise les Jesuites.

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Re: Absolutely Useless Facts About Yourself, No One Cares About

Post by GaryInVA » Mon Jan 07, 2019 1:16 pm

My arch nemesis at work resigned during the Christmas break. :chili: :chili: :chili:
hugodrax wrote:
Fri Apr 06, 2018 4:19 pm
This, gentlemen, is what it feels like when doves cry.
Even though I can't smoke at this time, for some reason I like this place.

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Re: Absolutely Useless Facts About Yourself, No One Cares About

Post by Cleon » Mon Jan 07, 2019 1:30 pm

Mrs. Cleon broke the passenger side mirror off the van with the trash can. I thought it would be a couple hundred for a heated, motorized mirror. Nope. $38 and ten minutes to change it out. The real bugger are those stupid plastic retaining pins that hold the interior door panel in place. I should have bought the removal tool.
"Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of heaven" - Jesus

"More people need to put their big boy britches on." - JMG

"Dang, a pipe slap." - JimVH

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Re: Absolutely Useless Facts About Yourself, No One Cares About

Post by FredS » Mon Jan 07, 2019 1:53 pm

Cleon wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 1:30 pm
Mrs. Cleon broke the passenger side mirror off the van with the trash can. I thought it would be a couple hundred for a heated, motorized mirror. Nope. $38 and ten minutes to change it out. The real bugger are those stupid plastic retaining pins that hold the interior door panel in place. I should have bought the removal tool.
You let her worry about the expense for a while before you told her how cheap/easy it was to fix though, right?
"If we ever get to heaven boys, it aint because we aint done nothin' wrong" - Kris Kristofferson

"One of the things I love about CPS is the frank and enthusiastic dysfunction here. God help me, I do love it so." – OldWorldSwine

"I'd like to put a hook in that puppet and swing it through a bunch of salmon!" - durangopipe

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Re: Absolutely Useless Facts About Yourself, No One Cares About

Post by JimVH » Mon Jan 07, 2019 2:01 pm

GaryInVA wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 1:16 pm
My arch nemesis at work resigned during the Christmas break. :chili: :chili: :chili:
I love it when a problem fixes itself.

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Re: Absolutely Useless Facts About Yourself, No One Cares About

Post by hugodrax » Mon Jan 07, 2019 2:04 pm

JimVH wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 2:01 pm
GaryInVA wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 1:16 pm
My arch nemesis at work resigned during the Christmas break. :chili: :chili: :chili:
I love it when a problem fixes itself.
You had a nemesis? That's pretty cool.
Notre Dame de Paris, priez pour nous y comprise les Jesuites.

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Re: Absolutely Useless Facts About Yourself, No One Cares About

Post by gaining_age » Mon Jan 07, 2019 2:25 pm

hugodrax wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 2:04 pm
JimVH wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 2:01 pm
GaryInVA wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 1:16 pm
My arch nemesis at work resigned during the Christmas break. :chili: :chili: :chili:
I love it when a problem fixes itself.
You had a nemesis? That's pretty cool.
Image
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The 6s of 1st John:
2:6 Whoever claims to live in him must walk as Jesus walked
3:6 No one who lives in him keeps on sinning

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Re: Absolutely Useless Facts About Yourself, No One Cares About

Post by GaryInVA » Mon Jan 07, 2019 2:27 pm

gaining_age wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 2:25 pm
hugodrax wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 2:04 pm
JimVH wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 2:01 pm
GaryInVA wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 1:16 pm
My arch nemesis at work resigned during the Christmas break. :chili: :chili: :chili:
I love it when a problem fixes itself.
You had a nemesis? That's pretty cool.
Image
She was the head of a department and scientist who worked against all things having to do with Quality Assurance documentation practices.
hugodrax wrote:
Fri Apr 06, 2018 4:19 pm
This, gentlemen, is what it feels like when doves cry.
Even though I can't smoke at this time, for some reason I like this place.

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hugodrax
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Re: Absolutely Useless Facts About Yourself, No One Cares About

Post by hugodrax » Mon Jan 07, 2019 2:29 pm

GaryInVA wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 2:27 pm
gaining_age wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 2:25 pm
hugodrax wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 2:04 pm
JimVH wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 2:01 pm
GaryInVA wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 1:16 pm
My arch nemesis at work resigned during the Christmas break. :chili: :chili: :chili:
I love it when a problem fixes itself.
You had a nemesis? That's pretty cool.
Image
She was the head of a department and scientist who worked against all things having to do with Quality Assurance documentation practices.
Ah. AuntieRoberta?
Notre Dame de Paris, priez pour nous y comprise les Jesuites.

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Re: Absolutely Useless Facts About Yourself, No One Cares About

Post by Cleon » Mon Jan 07, 2019 2:31 pm

FredS wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 1:53 pm
Cleon wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 1:30 pm
Mrs. Cleon broke the passenger side mirror off the van with the trash can. I thought it would be a couple hundred for a heated, motorized mirror. Nope. $38 and ten minutes to change it out. The real bugger are those stupid plastic retaining pins that hold the interior door panel in place. I should have bought the removal tool.
You let her worry about the expense for a while before you told her how cheap/easy it was to fix though, right?
I did. For a little while. Thing is, she was bringing in the trash can for me.
"Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of heaven" - Jesus

"More people need to put their big boy britches on." - JMG

"Dang, a pipe slap." - JimVH

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Re: Absolutely Useless Facts About Yourself, No One Cares About

Post by hugodrax » Mon Jan 07, 2019 3:01 pm

Cleon wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 2:31 pm
FredS wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 1:53 pm
Cleon wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 1:30 pm
Mrs. Cleon broke the passenger side mirror off the van with the trash can. I thought it would be a couple hundred for a heated, motorized mirror. Nope. $38 and ten minutes to change it out. The real bugger are those stupid plastic retaining pins that hold the interior door panel in place. I should have bought the removal tool.
You let her worry about the expense for a while before you told her how cheap/easy it was to fix though, right?
I did. For a little while. Thing is, she was bringing in the trash can for me.
You seem like an eminently decent and reasonable man. It is only machinery.
Notre Dame de Paris, priez pour nous y comprise les Jesuites.

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Re: Absolutely Useless Facts About Yourself, No One Cares About

Post by hugodrax » Mon Jan 07, 2019 6:19 pm

So my middle child, o figlia del mio cuore, handed me the shopping bag strategically so I just picked up the dog's duty with my bare fingers. Oh, how she laughed.

Looking back on this, it was actually pretty funny. I don't regret having killed her, though.
Notre Dame de Paris, priez pour nous y comprise les Jesuites.

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