Confessions

Where Fellowship and Camaraderie lives: that place where the CPS membership values fun and good fellowship as the cement of the community
User avatar
Fainn
I've attained the highest rank so far
I've attained the highest rank so far
Posts: 3468
Joined: Fri Jan 29, 2016 8:48 pm

Re: Confessions

Post by Fainn » Sun Oct 22, 2017 8:06 pm

Jocose wrote:
Fri Oct 20, 2017 1:16 pm
Hidden Content
This board requires you to be registered and logged-in to view hidden content.
I've slept with numerous women. The only one I stayed with is the one I waited for.
I'm bigger than the Beatles - Jesus

User avatar
sweetandsour
Minister of Pipe Breaking
Minister of Pipe Breaking
Posts: 8924
Joined: Sun Oct 12, 2008 6:00 pm
Location: Bayou Self
Contact:

Re: Confessions

Post by sweetandsour » Mon Dec 11, 2017 8:14 pm

Sitting in icu watching my wife, I would occasionally glance over at the crusty old stroke victim in the bed across the way, who seemed to always be staring at me.

My mind began to wander and played out the whole scene:
"WTF are you looking at", I said.
[Stroke victim doesn't reply, but just holds up his middle finger]
"Why you side mouthed MF", I shout, as I leap from my chair.
The old guy is pulling out wires from his head as he leaps from his bed.
We're almost at fists reach when the nurses reach us and restrain us.

"Sir? Sir?". I looked up at the nice young nurse that's caring for my wife. "Its ten o'clock, I'm afraid visiting time is over. Give your wife a kiss goodnight, and we'll see you in the morning.". "Yes ma'am", I replied, as I gave my wife a kiss and slipped away.
I'm old but I'm happy. (Most of the time.)

User avatar
Tatanka
Recently Discovered CPS is a Nut House
Recently Discovered CPS is a Nut House
Posts: 1733
Joined: Sun Nov 02, 2008 6:00 pm
Location: Bakersfield, California

Re: Confessions

Post by Tatanka » Tue Dec 12, 2017 10:44 pm

Our baby daughter, is sick with what the doctor said was partial pneumonia! She's a Manicurist, and is worried about cancelling out on clients, and is suggesting forcing herself to go to work. We're trying to convince her to put her health first. Her husband had to take her to Emergency Care.
It's my concerned confession tonight.
Soli Deo Gloria!

"If the doors (windows) of perception were cleansed, everything would appear as it is - infinite." ~ William Blake

User avatar
Roadmaster
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 12929
Joined: Sat Dec 29, 2007 6:00 pm
Location: Missouri The Show-me State

Re: Confessions

Post by Roadmaster » Wed Dec 13, 2017 7:57 am

Tatanka wrote:
Tue Dec 12, 2017 10:44 pm
Our baby daughter, is sick with what the doctor said was partial pneumonia! She's a Manicurist, and is worried about cancelling out on clients, and is suggesting forcing herself to go to work. We're trying to convince her to put her health first. Her husband had to take her to Emergency Care.
It's my concerned confession tonight.
Praying for your daughter.

User avatar
Tatanka
Recently Discovered CPS is a Nut House
Recently Discovered CPS is a Nut House
Posts: 1733
Joined: Sun Nov 02, 2008 6:00 pm
Location: Bakersfield, California

Re: Confessions

Post by Tatanka » Wed Dec 13, 2017 12:18 pm

Roadmaster wrote:
Wed Dec 13, 2017 7:57 am
Tatanka wrote:
Tue Dec 12, 2017 10:44 pm
Our baby daughter, is sick with what the doctor said was partial pneumonia! She's a Manicurist, and is worried about cancelling out on clients, and is suggesting forcing herself to go to work. We're trying to convince her to put her health first. Her husband had to take her to Emergency Care.
It's my concerned confession tonight.
Praying for your daughter.
I certainly appreciate that. She's the #4th child I was upset over hearing my wife's announcement. We cannot afford 4 children, is what my mind ket repeating. But this daughter has been one of life's greatest blessings. She is precious beyond words! A hard worker! So impressive. So she feels she MUST go back to work! I was in an Army hospital for 3 full months with terrible pneumonia! So I'm warning her to put her health first and rest and trust GOD, focus on getting well, taking the anti-biotics, etc., and RESTING! Thank you again for your thoughtful prayers for Tonya Joelle.
Soli Deo Gloria!

"If the doors (windows) of perception were cleansed, everything would appear as it is - infinite." ~ William Blake

User avatar
Bloodhound
Cannot Abide That Devil Weed
Cannot Abide That Devil Weed
Posts: 7039
Joined: Fri Jan 01, 2010 6:00 pm
Location: Rocky Mountains / Colorado
Contact:

Re: Confessions

Post by Bloodhound » Wed Dec 13, 2017 1:11 pm

Tatanka wrote:
Wed Dec 13, 2017 12:18 pm
Roadmaster wrote:
Wed Dec 13, 2017 7:57 am
Tatanka wrote:
Tue Dec 12, 2017 10:44 pm
Our baby daughter, is sick with what the doctor said was partial pneumonia! She's a Manicurist, and is worried about cancelling out on clients, and is suggesting forcing herself to go to work. We're trying to convince her to put her health first. Her husband had to take her to Emergency Care.
It's my concerned confession tonight.
Praying for your daughter.
I certainly appreciate that. She's the #4th child I was upset over hearing my wife's announcement. We cannot afford 4 children, is what my mind ket repeating. But this daughter has been one of life's greatest blessings. She is precious beyond words! A hard worker! So impressive. So she feels she MUST go back to work! I was in an Army hospital for 3 full months with terrible pneumonia! So I'm warning her to put her health first and rest and trust GOD, focus on getting well, taking the anti-biotics, etc., and RESTING! Thank you again for your thoughtful prayers for Tonya Joelle.
Praying now
Scott ( aka - Thor )
Do Justice...Love Mercy...Walk Humbly With Your GOD

User avatar
Tatanka
Recently Discovered CPS is a Nut House
Recently Discovered CPS is a Nut House
Posts: 1733
Joined: Sun Nov 02, 2008 6:00 pm
Location: Bakersfield, California

Re: Confessions

Post by Tatanka » Wed Dec 13, 2017 3:32 pm

Thank all of you neat guys, who remember our daughter Tonya Joelle T. (I often call her TJ) Heart warming, you guys are! :)
Soli Deo Gloria!

"If the doors (windows) of perception were cleansed, everything would appear as it is - infinite." ~ William Blake

User avatar
sweetandsour
Minister of Pipe Breaking
Minister of Pipe Breaking
Posts: 8924
Joined: Sun Oct 12, 2008 6:00 pm
Location: Bayou Self
Contact:

Re: Confessions

Post by sweetandsour » Fri Dec 15, 2017 8:06 pm

The talk of no clothes in another thread reminded me of the elderly lady in the bed next to ours in ICU last weekend. It was Sunday afternoon, and after her pastor came in and quietly sang to her he went out, and then two older ladies came in. No sooner were they behind the curtain when one of the ladies exclaimed "sister, get your clothes on or I'm gonna go blind!".

I have no idea what was going on, but I just couldn't help but have a good chuckle. At the time I really needed it too.
I'm old but I'm happy. (Most of the time.)

User avatar
DepartedLight
That boy's got a Thorazine deficiency.
Posts: 26686
Joined: Thu Nov 19, 2009 6:00 pm
Location: Tobacco Fairy HQ, North Carolina

Re: Confessions

Post by DepartedLight » Sat Dec 16, 2017 7:00 pm

I wish I had unlimited resources to expend on anyone other than me.

That is my view of heaven.

Yo, Jake-ski!

Yes, My Lord.

Shut up, dork. Ok. Look. Here's your next assignment. Make me proud, son.

Oh yeah. Please let it be just a little like that.

User avatar
hugodrax
All Around Nice Guy
All Around Nice Guy
Posts: 16268
Joined: Fri Jan 25, 2013 6:00 pm
Location: Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Contact:

Re: Confessions

Post by hugodrax » Sat Dec 16, 2017 8:48 pm

DepartedLight wrote:
Sat Dec 16, 2017 7:00 pm
I wish I had unlimited resources to expend on anyone other than me.

That is my view of heaven.

Yo, Jake-ski!

Yes, My Lord.

Shut up, dork. Ok. Look. Here's your next assignment. Make me proud, son.

Oh yeah. Please let it be just a little like that.
I think that is actually pretty good theology, Jake.
Etiam mihi opinio anserem perirent.

User avatar
UncleBob
CPS Theological Dogmatician
CPS Theological Dogmatician
Posts: 33729
Joined: Tue Aug 03, 2004 6:00 pm
Location: Lubbock, TX USA
Contact:

Re: Confessions

Post by UncleBob » Sun Dec 17, 2017 7:52 am

I bought a $75 bottle of bourbon for Mrs. UB.
"One man's theology is another man's belly laugh." - Robert A. Heinlein

"Many of the points here, taken to their logical conclusions, don't hold up to logic; they're simply Godded-up ways of saying "I don't like that." - Skip

"Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please." -Mark Twain

User avatar
JimVH
Ramone, the hair dresser with smokin' diapers
Ramone, the hair dresser with smokin' diapers
Posts: 21069
Joined: Sun May 18, 2008 6:00 pm
Location: I wasn't born in Texas, but I got here as soon as I could.
Contact:

Re: Confessions

Post by JimVH » Sun Dec 17, 2017 8:41 am

UncleBob wrote:
Sun Dec 17, 2017 7:52 am
I bought a $75 bottle of bourbon for Mrs. UB.
This thread is for confessions, not making the rest of us look bad.

User avatar
jdavis2809
Elder
Elder
Posts: 612
Joined: Sun May 17, 2015 6:25 pm
Location: VA

Re: Confessions

Post by jdavis2809 » Sun Dec 17, 2017 9:30 am

Hidden Content
This board requires you to be registered and logged-in to view hidden content.

User avatar
A_Morley
Cardinal Uncle Nacho
Cardinal Uncle Nacho
Posts: 10575
Joined: Fri May 05, 2006 6:00 pm
Location: Portland, Oregon

Re: Confessions

Post by A_Morley » Tue Dec 19, 2017 2:30 pm

Months ago now I ordered a tin of Capt. Black grape from P&C. It was almost more of a joke. I'd smoke it just so that I could say that I had and then send off additional baggies to interested CPSers. The box containing it arrived and I set it aside and went out of town for a week long gig.

It's easy enough for me to forget about less than pressing matters. It wasn't until it was mentioned to me again that I remembered the purple can so many smokers were almost afraid to fill their pipes with but couldn't seem to stop talking about. I'd crack it open and send off samples of it in a couple of days I told myself but then I'd forget about it all over again.

I was downtown and trying to ignore bystanders one day when a voice broke in that I couldn't ignore.

"Can you spare some pipe tobacco, sir?"

It was a youth of not over twenty sitting on the cobblestones in company with the buskers and pit bulls and dreadlocked anarchists of downtown. He was what I would have marked as a gutter punk or crust punk: willfully homeless and itinerant political dissidents who are a conspicuous feature of Oregon's urban culture with their homemade patchwork punk clothing and DIY piercings and body art. Being solicited for money or cigarettes by white kids with tribal tattoos and probable trust funds is a common enough irritant in the downtownscape of any Pacific Northwest city. This kid, however, was both polite and clearly spoken and he was holding a briar that I quickly saw was a Kaywoodie. Seeing as I was smoking a pipe, he thought he would try his luck. His compatriots would likely have asked if I had any cigarettes or made some crack about Sherlock Holmes or smoking weed. I gave him a fill from out my pouch and walked on.

In the weeks to come I saw the same boy once or twice. He would say something like, "There's the nice gentleman with the pipe," and I'd give him a fill from my pouch. One day when I saw him as I was walking home. Recalling that unopened can of Capt. Black Grape for the first time in weeks, I took it and went back to where I had seen him downtown and presented him with it. He seemed very grateful and I haven't seen him since. I told myself that I'd simply buy another can for later sampling, but I never remember it when I am ordering tobacco, for whatever reason.

I am sorry if my forgetfulness had upset or disappointed anybody.
His Eminence
Cardinal of CPS

User avatar
sweetandsour
Minister of Pipe Breaking
Minister of Pipe Breaking
Posts: 8924
Joined: Sun Oct 12, 2008 6:00 pm
Location: Bayou Self
Contact:

Re: Confessions

Post by sweetandsour » Fri Feb 02, 2018 6:05 am

I can't understand Bitcoin. I sure hope there's none in my managed portfolio.

3. I plan to call my broker this mrng and issue a sell order for everything.
I'm old but I'm happy. (Most of the time.)

User avatar
Roadmaster
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 12929
Joined: Sat Dec 29, 2007 6:00 pm
Location: Missouri The Show-me State

Re: Confessions

Post by Roadmaster » Fri Feb 02, 2018 2:53 pm

A_Morley wrote:
Tue Dec 19, 2017 2:30 pm
Months ago now I ordered a tin of Capt. Black grape from P&C. It was almost more of a joke. I'd smoke it just so that I could say that I had and then send off additional baggies to interested CPSers. The box containing it arrived and I set it aside and went out of town for a week long gig.

It's easy enough for me to forget about less than pressing matters. It wasn't until it was mentioned to me again that I remembered the purple can so many smokers were almost afraid to fill their pipes with but couldn't seem to stop talking about. I'd crack it open and send off samples of it in a couple of days I told myself but then I'd forget about it all over again.

I was downtown and trying to ignore bystanders one day when a voice broke in that I couldn't ignore.

"Can you spare some pipe tobacco, sir?"

It was a youth of not over twenty sitting on the cobblestones in company with the buskers and pit bulls and dreadlocked anarchists of downtown. He was what I would have marked as a gutter punk or crust punk: willfully homeless and itinerant political dissidents who are a conspicuous feature of Oregon's urban culture with their homemade patchwork punk clothing and DIY piercings and body art. Being solicited for money or cigarettes by white kids with tribal tattoos and probable trust funds is a common enough irritant in the downtownscape of any Pacific Northwest city. This kid, however, was both polite and clearly spoken and he was holding a briar that I quickly saw was a Kaywoodie. Seeing as I was smoking a pipe, he thought he would try his luck. His compatriots would likely have asked if I had any cigarettes or made some crack about Sherlock Holmes or smoking weed. I gave him a fill from out my pouch and walked on.

In the weeks to come I saw the same boy once or twice. He would say something like, "There's the nice gentleman with the pipe," and I'd give him a fill from my pouch. One day when I saw him as I was walking home. Recalling that unopened can of Capt. Black Grape for the first time in weeks, I took it and went back to where I had seen him downtown and presented him with it. He seemed very grateful and I haven't seen him since. I told myself that I'd simply buy another can for later sampling, but I never remember it when I am ordering tobacco, for whatever reason.

I am sorry if my forgetfulness had upset or disappointed anybody.
Enjoyed reading this, thanks for posting.

User avatar
OldWorldSwine
rootle round the ear 'ole
rootle round the ear 'ole
Posts: 9525
Joined: Sat Aug 01, 2009 6:00 pm

Re: Confessions

Post by OldWorldSwine » Fri Feb 02, 2018 3:17 pm

Roadmaster wrote:
Fri Feb 02, 2018 2:53 pm
A_Morley wrote:
Tue Dec 19, 2017 2:30 pm
Months ago now I ordered a tin of Capt. Black grape from P&C. It was almost more of a joke. I'd smoke it just so that I could say that I had and then send off additional baggies to interested CPSers. The box containing it arrived and I set it aside and went out of town for a week long gig.

It's easy enough for me to forget about less than pressing matters. It wasn't until it was mentioned to me again that I remembered the purple can so many smokers were almost afraid to fill their pipes with but couldn't seem to stop talking about. I'd crack it open and send off samples of it in a couple of days I told myself but then I'd forget about it all over again.

I was downtown and trying to ignore bystanders one day when a voice broke in that I couldn't ignore.

"Can you spare some pipe tobacco, sir?"

It was a youth of not over twenty sitting on the cobblestones in company with the buskers and pit bulls and dreadlocked anarchists of downtown. He was what I would have marked as a gutter punk or crust punk: willfully homeless and itinerant political dissidents who are a conspicuous feature of Oregon's urban culture with their homemade patchwork punk clothing and DIY piercings and body art. Being solicited for money or cigarettes by white kids with tribal tattoos and probable trust funds is a common enough irritant in the downtownscape of any Pacific Northwest city. This kid, however, was both polite and clearly spoken and he was holding a briar that I quickly saw was a Kaywoodie. Seeing as I was smoking a pipe, he thought he would try his luck. His compatriots would likely have asked if I had any cigarettes or made some crack about Sherlock Holmes or smoking weed. I gave him a fill from out my pouch and walked on.

In the weeks to come I saw the same boy once or twice. He would say something like, "There's the nice gentleman with the pipe," and I'd give him a fill from my pouch. One day when I saw him as I was walking home. Recalling that unopened can of Capt. Black Grape for the first time in weeks, I took it and went back to where I had seen him downtown and presented him with it. He seemed very grateful and I haven't seen him since. I told myself that I'd simply buy another can for later sampling, but I never remember it when I am ordering tobacco, for whatever reason.

I am sorry if my forgetfulness had upset or disappointed anybody.
Enjoyed reading this, thanks for posting.
Yup. More pipe stories, everyone!
"There's what's right and there's what's right and never the twain shall meet."

User avatar
Roadmaster
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 12929
Joined: Sat Dec 29, 2007 6:00 pm
Location: Missouri The Show-me State

Re: Confessions

Post by Roadmaster » Fri Feb 02, 2018 4:35 pm

sweetandsour wrote:
Fri Feb 02, 2018 6:05 am
I can't understand Bitcoin. I sure hope there's none in my managed portfolio.

3. I plan to call my broker this mrng and issue a sell order for everything.
Looks like 1929 in many ways.
Selling may very be a good idea but where do you with the money, precious metals?

User avatar
Roadmaster
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 12929
Joined: Sat Dec 29, 2007 6:00 pm
Location: Missouri The Show-me State

Re: Confessions

Post by Roadmaster » Fri Feb 02, 2018 4:44 pm

Last edited by Roadmaster on Fri Feb 02, 2018 4:51 pm, edited 1 time in total.

User avatar
sweetandsour
Minister of Pipe Breaking
Minister of Pipe Breaking
Posts: 8924
Joined: Sun Oct 12, 2008 6:00 pm
Location: Bayou Self
Contact:

Re: Confessions

Post by sweetandsour » Fri Feb 02, 2018 4:45 pm

Roadmaster wrote:
Fri Feb 02, 2018 4:35 pm
sweetandsour wrote:
Fri Feb 02, 2018 6:05 am
I can't understand Bitcoin. I sure hope there's none in my managed portfolio.

3. I plan to call my broker this mrng and issue a sell order for everything.
Looks like 1929 in many ways.
Selling may very be a good idea but where do you with the money, precious metals?
I woke up this morning expecting a 1000 point correction. Missed it by abt 350. Still ahead for the year though. I stay away from metals. Bond rates went up today, but the thing to do is go to cash, and then get back in at the right time. When's the right time? Heh heh ...
Anyway, this is the confession thread, and I've already done mine today.
I'm old but I'm happy. (Most of the time.)

Post Reply