Confessions

Where Fellowship and Camaraderie lives: that place where the CPS membership values fun and good fellowship as the cement of the community
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Fainn
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Re: Confessions

Post by Fainn » Mon Jul 23, 2018 1:58 pm

ReverendThom wrote:
Thu Jul 12, 2018 9:24 pm
I dislike alter calls.

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Fainn
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Re: Confessions

Post by Fainn » Mon Jul 23, 2018 1:58 pm

I have a terrible fear I'm going to wuss out on getting the tattoo.
I'm bigger than the Beatles - Jesus

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mont974x4
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Re: Confessions

Post by mont974x4 » Wed Jul 25, 2018 9:36 pm

With my wife out of town I have been binge watching The Office. I don’t find it that funny. But I can’t stop watching.


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It sounded better when the voices in my head were saying it.

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JimVH
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Re: Confessions

Post by JimVH » Wed Jul 25, 2018 10:01 pm

mont974x4 wrote:
Wed Jul 25, 2018 9:36 pm
With my wife out of town I have been binge watching The Office. I don’t find it that funny. But I can’t stop watching.


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Every now and then I'll call my staff into my office and we'll watch an episode or two on Netflix. We call it in-service training.

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mont974x4
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Re: Confessions

Post by mont974x4 » Wed Jul 25, 2018 10:03 pm

JimVH wrote:
mont974x4 wrote:
Wed Jul 25, 2018 9:36 pm
With my wife out of town I have been binge watching The Office. I don’t find it that funny. But I can’t stop watching.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Every now and then I'll call my staff into my office and we'll watch an episode or two on Netflix. We call it in-service training.
LOL. Nice


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It sounded better when the voices in my head were saying it.

Ire attracter-at-large and general misanthrope.

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sweetandsour
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Re: Confessions

Post by sweetandsour » Sun Aug 05, 2018 10:43 pm

I asked my wife, "what is groping?".
Fishing, she says, without a line or pole, like wading along a bank for catfish.
Apparently it's also something done by pastors of mega churches, to their women, I replied.
I'm old but I'm happy. (Most of the time.)

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Thoth
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Re: Confessions

Post by Thoth » Mon Aug 06, 2018 10:21 am

During the whole Bill Clinton imbroglio, made the mistaken of correcting my mothers misconception of what oral sex was (she thought it was talking dirty, then when I said it wasn't that she thought it was kissing)
"Go and reconcile with him who has trespassed against you before he comes and apologises to you and steals your crown" - H.H. Pope Cyril VI<br><br>"O Lord I was not aware of the treasure within me that is You" - H.H. Pope Shenouda III

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Tatanka
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Re: Confessions

Post by Tatanka » Mon Aug 06, 2018 3:44 pm

Thoth wrote:
Mon Aug 06, 2018 10:21 am
During the whole Bill Clinton imbroglio, made the mistaken of correcting my mothers misconception of what oral sex was (she thought it was talking dirty, then when I said it wasn't that she thought it was kissing)
Oh for more innocence today! :)
Soli Deo Gloria!

"If the doors (windows) of perception were cleansed, everything would appear as it is - infinite." ~ William Blake

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Re: Confessions

Post by Sir Moose » Tue Aug 07, 2018 11:04 pm

I got distracted and lit the wrong end of my cigar. Thankfully, it held together for me.
In theory, theory and practice are the same. In practice, they are not.

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Thoth
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Re: Confessions

Post by Thoth » Wed Aug 08, 2018 11:45 am

Sir Moose wrote:
Tue Aug 07, 2018 11:04 pm
I got distracted and lit the wrong end of my cigar. Thankfully, it held together for me.
Better than putting the lit end accidentally into your mouth... (not that I did that but once while serving in the altar forgot I was holding a candle and went to scratch my nose and set my hair on fire)
"Go and reconcile with him who has trespassed against you before he comes and apologises to you and steals your crown" - H.H. Pope Cyril VI<br><br>"O Lord I was not aware of the treasure within me that is You" - H.H. Pope Shenouda III

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Tatanka
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Re: Confessions

Post by Tatanka » Wed Aug 08, 2018 12:48 pm

Thoth wrote:
Wed Aug 08, 2018 11:45 am
Sir Moose wrote:
Tue Aug 07, 2018 11:04 pm
I got distracted and lit the wrong end of my cigar. Thankfully, it held together for me.
Better than putting the lit end accidentally into your mouth... (not that I did that but once while serving in the altar forgot I was holding a candle and went to scratch my nose and set my hair on fire)
Then why didn't you go into intertainment a as a stand-up "lighted" comedian? :)
Soli Deo Gloria!

"If the doors (windows) of perception were cleansed, everything would appear as it is - infinite." ~ William Blake

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durangopipe
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Re: Confessions

Post by durangopipe » Wed Aug 08, 2018 3:29 pm

Okay, about the beard . . . time for the confession:

I had no intention of shaving it off.

My wife and I were getting ready for bed and engaged in conversation. I got out my beard trimmer to trim my beard while we were talking. Distracted by our conversation, I made a pass through my chin - before putting on the plastic guide. Shaved half my beard down to stubble.

It looked horrible.

I decided to take off the rest of the beard, leave the mustache, and let the beard grow back - so shave off the rest of the beard I did. Now, I looked like and elderly Sonny Bono.

No more Gabby Hayes. Suddenly, Yosemite Sam.

The mustache had to go, too.
. . . be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:32 (NKJV)

The most improper job of any man, even saints, is bossing other men. Not one in a million is fit for it, and least of all those who seek the opportunity.. J.R.R. Tolkien

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CodeMonkey
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Re: Confessions

Post by CodeMonkey » Wed Aug 08, 2018 6:21 pm

Thoth wrote:
Wed Aug 08, 2018 11:45 am
Sir Moose wrote:
Tue Aug 07, 2018 11:04 pm
I got distracted and lit the wrong end of my cigar. Thankfully, it held together for me.
Better than putting the lit end accidentally into your mouth... (not that I did that but once while serving in the altar forgot I was holding a candle and went to scratch my nose and set my hair on fire)
Please forgive me for laughing at your misfortune.
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rgcurrey
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Re: Confessions

Post by rgcurrey » Thu Aug 09, 2018 6:51 am

durangopipe wrote:
Wed Aug 08, 2018 3:29 pm
Okay, about the beard . . . time for the confession:

I had no intention of shaving it off.

My wife and I were getting ready for bed and engaged in conversation. I got out my beard trimmer to trim my beard while we were talking. Distracted by our conversation, I made a pass through my chin - before putting on the plastic guide. Shaved half my beard down to stubble.

It looked horrible.

I decided to take off the rest of the beard, leave the mustache, and let the beard grow back - so shave off the rest of the beard I did. Now, I looked like and elderly Sonny Bono.

No more Gabby Hayes. Suddenly, Yosemite Sam.

The mustache had to go, too.
But you could have been the root'nest toot'nest fly fisher this side of the Pecos.
Well I got a job and tried to put my money away
But I got debts that no honest man can pay - B. Springsteen

And he said to the man,
"Behold, the fear of the Lord, that is wisdom,
and to turn away from evil is understanding." - Job 28:28

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durangopipe
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Re: Confessions

Post by durangopipe » Thu Aug 09, 2018 9:04 am

rgcurrey wrote:
Thu Aug 09, 2018 6:51 am
durangopipe wrote:
Wed Aug 08, 2018 3:29 pm
Okay, about the beard . . . time for the confession:

I had no intention of shaving it off.

My wife and I were getting ready for bed and engaged in conversation. I got out my beard trimmer to trim my beard while we were talking. Distracted by our conversation, I made a pass through my chin - before putting on the plastic guide. Shaved half my beard down to stubble.

It looked horrible.

I decided to take off the rest of the beard, leave the mustache, and let the beard grow back - so shave off the rest of the beard I did. Now, I looked like and elderly Sonny Bono.

No more Gabby Hayes. Suddenly, Yosemite Sam.

The mustache had to go, too.
But you could have been the root'nest toot'nest fly fisher this side of the Pecos.
Well dang it, now ya tell me.
. . . be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:32 (NKJV)

The most improper job of any man, even saints, is bossing other men. Not one in a million is fit for it, and least of all those who seek the opportunity.. J.R.R. Tolkien

2017 Morley - Outstanding BRATASS of the Year

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Thoth
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Re: Confessions

Post by Thoth » Thu Aug 09, 2018 10:04 am

CodeMonkey wrote:
Wed Aug 08, 2018 6:21 pm
Thoth wrote:
Wed Aug 08, 2018 11:45 am
Sir Moose wrote:
Tue Aug 07, 2018 11:04 pm
I got distracted and lit the wrong end of my cigar. Thankfully, it held together for me.
Better than putting the lit end accidentally into your mouth... (not that I did that but once while serving in the altar forgot I was holding a candle and went to scratch my nose and set my hair on fire)
Please forgive me for laughing at your misfortune.
Its okay thats my wife's main source of amusement. It was pretty funny if you saw the second priest that happened to be celebrating in the liturgy see me and gesture wildly at me trying to get my attention that it was happening.
"Go and reconcile with him who has trespassed against you before he comes and apologises to you and steals your crown" - H.H. Pope Cyril VI<br><br>"O Lord I was not aware of the treasure within me that is You" - H.H. Pope Shenouda III

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