mocking birds . . .

The part of the church where the silliest things happen. Conversations that sound like they belong in the youth room will be moved here.
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durangopipe
Under-secretary to the Minister of Pipe Breaking
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mocking birds . . .

Post by durangopipe » Sun May 13, 2018 4:53 pm

So there is this parrot and he knows a bunch of swear words and the owner says , "If you don't stop swearing I'm going to sick you in the freezer." So the parrot starts swearing and the guy puts him in the freezer. The parrot continues cussing up a storm but after a few minutes the parrot suddenly stops. The guy says "Will you stop swearing now?" and the parrot says "I'll stop, but first I want to know what the chicken did."

An old sea captain with a wooden leg, a hook for a hand and a black patch over one eye is telling a kid how he got his injuries: "It was a big sea battle, lad. A cannonball flew across the deck and took off me leg. Later a doctor friend fixed me up with this wooden one." "How did you lose your hand?" asks the kid. "The same battle, lad. The pirates, they boarded me ship and their captain, he whacked off me hand with his cutlass. Later, the doctor friend gave me this hook." The kid says. "I guess you lost your eye in the same battle." "No". says the captain. "I was looking up one day, and a seagull crapped right in me eye." "Gee" says the kid "You mean the seagull crap blinded you?." "No" the captain replies,"First day with me new hook."

Two crows are sitting on a fence, when a jet-fighter doing training maneuvers roars overhead. 1st crow says wistfully "Man, I sure wish I could fly that fast!" 2nd crow remarks "If you had two butts, and both of them were on fire, you could!"

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JimVH
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Re: mocking birds . . .

Post by JimVH » Sun May 13, 2018 6:26 pm

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Well done, DP.

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